Dealing with arguments

  We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them. – Albert Einstein  

 Almost everyday we have disagreements with people at school, work, at home and even in public places, with friends, with partners and other different persons. The thing, is that arguing isn’t the right solution to a problem, sometimes it causes bigger problems than you had before.

   When an argument happen, the most important thing is to try not to let a calm discussion turn into a heated argument or even worse. First of all, pay attention to how you begin the conversation. If you’re the person who is wrong, just admit it ! That is a good way to avoid an argument. Saying ‘sorry’ is also a method, just apologize and the other person will have much more respect for you in the future.  Try not to exaggerate, cause this will just make the other  person think you’re being unreasonable and will probably make him or her stop listening to your arguments. Sometimes we just can’t avoid a discussion turning into an argument. But if you do start arguing with someone, it is necessary to keep things under control. One of the most important things is not to raise your voice. Raising your voice will make the other person lose their temper too. If you find yourself raising your voice, stop for a moment and take a deep breath. If you can talk calmly and quietly, you’ll find your partner will be more ready to think about what you’re saying.  Try to stick to the point, keep to the topic you’re talking about. Don’t bring up old arguments, just concentrate on solving the one problem you’re having and leave the other things for another time.  Call ‘Time out’ if you think that an argument is getting out of control. You can continue the discussion the next day when perhaps both of you are feeling less tense and angry. You will probably find that the problem is much easier to solve when you’re both had a good night’s sleep.

   Some people think that arguing is always bad, but in fact conflict is a normal part of life, and an important part of any relationship.If you don’t learn to argue properly, then when a real problem comes along, you won’t be prepared to face it together. Think of all the smaller argument as training sessions, and learn how to argue cleanly and fairly. It will help your relationship become stronger and last longer.

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